Before you think it; no I am not pregnant!
Over the past few months as the girls reached one, Josh and I have started talking and thinking about whether there’s going to be a baby number 3… we are not planning another baby in the near future but as the girls become less like babies by the day we’ve started to wonder if this is our family complete or if we have room for 1 more.
For both of us, we are very much divided on our thoughts on this matter. On the one hand, we already have TWO children. And two is a lot. Any more and we’ll be outnumbered! We definitely would want more than one child as we both love having siblings but since we already have that there isn’t as much of a “need” to have another baby. Of course, with having three children comes a new car, new home, extra room when booking holidays etc. So practically speaking there is a lot to think about… as we love travelling it’s definitely something that makes us question whether we want another.
There’s also the gender issue… we have often had people ask us if we are going to “try again for a boy” as if we shouldn’t be happy or content with having only girls. For some reason, it’s as if your family is not complete if you don’t have one of each and as I grew up in an all girl family I know that’s not true! It worries me that if our third baby was a girl we may feel disappointed or people would feel sorry for us and I really don’t want that. Having two girls is enough. Our girls are enough and we do not feel like we are lacking in any way because they aren’t boys.
As we are still young we have the benefit that once our girls are grown up we will still be pretty young. When the girls turn 18 I’ll only be 40! If we leave it too young we will sacrifice these benefits and that’s something that we definitely think about. Plus I haven’t started my career yet and I’ve got the benefit of once the girls are in nursery or school, I can get on with my work and finding my path. I love being home with my girls whilst they are still little and if I had another baby I’d probably want to do the same for them.
On the other hand… having another baby would be amazing. Having twins meant that everything has been such a blur! Time has gone so quickly and I barely remember a lot of it… now the girls aren’t “babies” anymore I feel like that stage of our life is over before it began and I kind of don’t want it to be! It’d be weird to think I’m not going to have another baby!
I also would like to have another baby when I’m already a mum… being a new mum is crazy and you’re learning everything on the job. Second time around I feel like I’d be so much more confident in my abilities and know what I was doing a bit better! I feel like I would also cherish every moment and enjoy it a lot more. I was so desperate to get to the next stage with the girls because it felt so hard all the time because there was two so I’d definitely cherish it more next time!
I’d also like to have less of a surprise pregnancy and feel really happy and excited about it because last time I was so upset and shocked. It’d also be amazing to have a better birth this time, whether it was VBAC or elective c section it’d be nice to have some closure from the trauma of the girls’ birth.
Of course I’d love to see the girls as big sisters but that is quite hard to imagine right now given that they smash their dolly’s head on the floor regularly!!
Finally, the twin thing! If you have twins once you’re more likely to have them again! And whilst I loved having twins, the thought of doing it all again is exhausting! Although, having 1 baby would probably be a walk in the park compared to two!!
So that’s it… that’s where I’m at! I don’t know if we’ll have another baby but if we do it won’t be for a good while yet!